Reimagined & Re-Alive
It's Friday night & the apartment is as warm As your cheeks were when we argued, Glistening with sheens of sweat Your brother has the same red glow, and after talking to him that one time, I was convinced that I loved him Only because I saw a bit of you in a bit of him & melting your facial features together felt better than mixing My tears with the stew that Mama tried forcing me to eat Yesterday it was August, and the day before that was May. And then you died, and I'm trying to live again. But how. I spit to God when I speak to you. My fingers run under the sink’s tap water They do a little flaccid dance that reminds me of the way Your bones mixed with mine under the covers… …But the water is too hot & by the time I realize it my hands are white and rumpled Their blisters shatter like little marbles While Mama pours vodka on my fingers, spitting curses in Russian She asks me how I could be so careless but I don't remember if I was being reckless or if I did i